Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis
恰巧在521这样一个有纪念意义的日子完结，那么就祝他们长久地愉快相处吧~我个人觉得521比520更有意义，毕竟德语里，关系远才称呼“您”，亲密的人之间称呼“你”。
Chapter 14 New Year and Beyond （Part 2）
As we're getting close to the castle, I feel a twinge in my chest for no reason. I grab Severus' arm tighter, and he just gives me his trademark expression: his upper lip is curling! The git! At least he restrains himself from sarcastic remarks. I should take it as my consolation. Maybe it's high time to take advantage of my divided personalities and shelf the whole integrating thing for a while. Before I step into the castle, I draw in a deep breath, forfeit my cognition of the current identity, and say in a remarkably convincing tone, "I'm so excited to meet your friends, Shawn."
Judging from the twinkle in his dark eyes, he has understood my strategy and decided to play along. He leads me to the grand hall and gives me some brief introductions along the way as if he brings a real muggle date here. Being Severus, he keeps the tour short and dull, making Hogwarts less marvelous than it should be.
Professor McGonagall is clearly shocked when she sets eyes on me, "I thought you were joking about bringing a date, a muggle woman no less. Don't take it in the wrong way. You're both welcomed."
I shift my eyes between them, waiting to be introduced. Severus replies drily, "Well, this is Susiel Pond. As you can see, she is real. Susiel, this is Headmistress McGonagall."
I smile," Nice to meet you, Headmistress. Pray to forgive me. This is the first time I hear your name. Shawn seldom shares his other life with me. I'm so flatted he even invited me to this extraordinary party. May I say, your school is magnificent."
Professor McGonagall nods in a warm way, "Severus is a very private man and good at keeping secrets. I can tell you're a fine young lady from first sight. It's a pity I can't spend more time with you. Let Severus show you around. Again, welcome to Hogwarts, do enjoy yourself." With this, the Headmistress takes her leave.
Apart from the festival decoration, Hogwarts doesn't change much. Unlike the ever-changing muggle society, the wizardry world prefers permanent and honors heritage. I glance around and find many familiar yet strange faces, Professor Flitwick, Professor Sinistra, Kingsley, Harry, Hermione, the Weasley's, and some people from The Ministry of Magic. Great, as far as my eyes can reach, Remus is not here.
As my heart finally settles, a thought struck me: What I wouldn't give up to meet Alastor here. I miss my grumpy mentor every single day! He cared for me in his own way. Yet magic rule number 1: You can't bring back the dead.
I am lost in my contemplation when Severus whispers in my ear, "Looking for someone in particular?"
I pull a smile, "I am waiting for your introduction. It's social etiquette from where I belong."
He smirks, "You don't have to wait long."
Few students stay for the holiday, so it's not a crowed party, which means I have drawn considerable attention as a stranger in a red dress, not to mention Snape's date. I doubt he has ever brought a date willingly to any occasion. Wizards or muggles, human beings are equally curious and gossipy.
Molly is the first to approach us. By greeting Severus, she gets enough information about me to satisfy her curiosity. More people follow her lead. One may be fooled into thinking people really like Severus for that matter, but I surely know better.
After a while, I have been appropriately introduced to whomever cares to know me, and Severus has been "borrowed" away from me by his former colleagues. Needless to say, an interrogation awaits him. Those professors are anxious to squeeze more juicy details to entertain their dreary lives.
As much as I want to watch them annoying Severus, I'm not going to deprive the faculty of their rare amusement. After all, they may feel more comfortable to ask awkward questions without my presence, may even get an answer if Severus is really in a good mood.
Amused with the vivid picture in my head, I decide to check the buffet and make myself occupied. As always, the house-elves did a splendid job. I am idling around with a glass of fire whiskey in my hand when I feel the ear cuff becoming warm. It only means one thing: A werewolf is around. To play safe, I've left my wand at Severus' house. A muggle is not supposed to carry a wand.
But I'm at Hogwarts, even Milla won't be crazy enough to attack me here, with all these witnesses. I have nothing to worry about. I clear my head and keep my pace, ignoring the now burning sensation.
"Dora." A hoarse voice calls behind me.
If it were a movie, what happened next would be shattered glass, stopped footsteps, stiffed shoulders, and possibly redden eyes, successively. It's not a movie, so I did no such thing. Instead, I keep moving at the same pace. I am far more mature to fall for a random call. Besides, I trust Severus' skill. As long as I wear the jewelry, there is no way a werewolf can detect me.
"Dora, stop. I know it's you." He doesn't give up, and I can sense him approaching, right behind me.
For he isn't about to do any harm, I'm not in physical danger. Thus, the alarming spell won't warn Snape.
"Dora." Now, he puts a hand on my bare shoulder. I have to stop. Swirling around, I glare at him with genuine anger and question him in a low but patronizing voice, "Excuse me, but do I know you?"
Seeing me stop, he withdraws his hand, "Dora, drop it, please."
Here he is, eyes fixed on me. He seems so sad. That naive Nymphadora was willing to sacrifice everything to ease his sorrow, to make him happy, yet failed miserably and ultimately. I am not her. I won't yield to those brown eyes. Instead, I look straight into his.
"You must have mistaken me for someone else, not someone dear to you, I gather. Or you just tried to hit on a woman with a pickup line even older than you?" I mock him with no mercy. From the pain on his face, I know that every word I said is a dagger in him. So, I do have learned something from Severus after all the time we spent together.
"Dora, you're dear to me, and..."
"People don't mistake a dear one." I cut him off harshly. His misery satisfies me greatly, but I need to get away from him now, cause Nymphadora is crying in the corner of my head, striving for taking control of the body.
"If you'll excuse me." I trot away, and he doesn't follow. I spot Severus in the far end of the hall and head to him as quickly as I can.
"Darling, where have you been? You won't believe it. A man hit on me with an ancient line!" I reach out for his arm and tell him what just happened with faked amusement.
Usually, he is not an advocator of showing affection in public, but this time he takes me into his arms and asks, "What happened?" Before I can answer, he said wryly, "Don't bother. Lupin is coming, for you, I assume."
Please don't push me away. Please don't suspect me! I am yelling inside.
Severus pulls away, releases me from his arms, but keeps a hand around my waist. His gesture makes me calm down a little. I turned around, facing Remus, but still cling to my date.
Remus can't hide the disbelief on his face when he sees whom I am with. His eyes shift between Severus and me. None of us speaks.
Finally, Snape breaks the silence, "Lupin, my date just told me her encounter with a strange man. Well, I can't believe you managed to exceed your lower bound."
With Severus' presence, Remus composes himself and regains his mild manner, "My sincere apology, Severus. Your date reminds me of someone I hold dear."
"Forgive me if I can't associate her with anyone that might be dear to YOU." He drawls ironically.
Remus surely knows better than bickering with my date. He just ignores his insult and asks gently, "Would you please introduce us properly, Severus? It's not like we have new faces visiting Hogwarts every day."
"Remus Lupin, a professor at Hogwarts; Ms. Pond, MY date."
I almost chuckle on his perfunctory and possessive introduction. I feel wanted and loved every time Severus demonstrates his jealousy, possessiveness, and protectiveness, which was so rare in Remus' case.
"I suppose Ms. Pond has a first name?" He seems to talk to Snape, but he is looking at me.
"Susiel, Susiel Pond. I'll appreciate it if you address me correctly next time." I just can't bear him calling me Dora one more time. That is a name used by my father, by someone supposed to love me, certainly not him.
"Duly noted, Ms. Pond." Remus is polite, as always.
"So, where is your date, Lupin? I am under the impression that you've found someone new to replace Nymphadora. Care to introduce her?" Severus just takes every opportunity to provoke him, and it works this time.
"My mate doesn't enjoy socializing with wizards or witches much, and she is not a replacement for anyone." Remus sounds distinctly colder at the mention of his mate.
"You do have a colorful life, Mr. Lupin. A lady's man, I may say." I just want to hurt him, because Nymphadora feels hurt.
At this moment, music starts, and people begin to dance.
Remus holds out a hand to me and invites, " May I have the honor? Severus, if you don't mind."
I am screaming inside! How dare he ask me for my hand? How dare he even come to talk to me?
"In fact, I do mind." "Sorry, I don't feel like dancing." Severus and I reject him in unison.
He doesn't retreat, "I insist. We don't want to make a scene, do we?"
He has a point. After all, I can't afford that he exposes my true identity in public. Reluctantly, I take his hand, "Just one dance, and you'll leave us alone?" Beside me, Severus lets out a humph.
"I promise." He leads me to the dancing floor.
We sway to the music, but I don't feel any joy dancing with him. Strangely, neither does Nymphadora.
"I know you have something to counter Milla's tracing mark, but that's not how I recognize you. Yes, I know who you really are, Dora, so don't try to deny it."
So, he knows it all the time! He knows his mate is hunting me. Nymphadora's sorrow drains all the strength in me. I am too tired to argue with him. In fact, I am too tired to do anything. All I want is the music ends, and I can flee from this place as quickly as possible and never return! Severus is right about me: I have an instinct of fleeing.
"You're dear to me, you still are, and I regret how things ended up that way. I'm truly sorry, Dora. I know you hate me, and you have every right to do so. I'm not asking for your forgiveness. I just want you to know that I didn't recognize you when it all happened. I was detoxifying from Wolfsbane at that time. When I transferred, I lost all the human consciousness, driving only by animal instincts. All I knew at that time was my pregnant mate was in danger."
"Are you happy, Mr. Lupin?" Suddenly, I find my peace. Listening to his narrative, it feels a story, werewolf, and all. They are surreal to my current life. As for Nymphadora, she finds her peace at the word pregnant. She has long known that a Metamorphmagus is close to sterile with humans, and there is zero chance with a werewolf.
"We are. What about you, with Severus?"
"I've found what I have been looking for so long."
We enjoy the rest of the song in complete silence, knowing we have said all that needed to be said.
As the last beat drops, Severus doesn't waste a second to pull me into his arms.
"So, what do you think?" He asks me while leads my footsteps. He is a passable dancer if you ask me.
"I'm not in love with him, and I never will, if that's what you are asking." I lean to him for support, "I just think of a suitable present for you."
"Which is?"
"A nicely typed referral letter. I'll change to another psychiatrist after you sign it."
"You can't possibly consider firing me is a present for me."
"Severus, I intend to stick to this identity, and I want you to participate in my current life. If you remain as my doctor, I have to send all my housekeepers away before you visit. I can't invite you as a date for my social events. I mean, if you want it too. I'm not pushing you to anything serious."
"I have never considered a public relationship with Susiel Pond. I am so much older, and I am rubbish at relationships. But if It's something that isn't completely out of the realm of possibility for you, then I'd be lying if I said it was out of the realm of possibility for me." He is bubbling nonsense, which is adorable.
"Is that a yes?"
"I am not saying no."
I pause the dance and stand on tiptoe to kiss my git on the mouth.
We've never exchanged the L word, yet I feel content. Maybe with Severus, I don't need a declaration or commitment to make this relationship work.
Severus doesn't know that time is always on the Metamorphmagus' side, and as we mutual, we can die in the shape we desire.
I shall die in the shape that I live with him.
---------------------------------FIN--------------------------
Milla就是个工具人，懒得帮她想设定-v-||| 虽然我跳船，也还是有一只脚固定在RL/NT上的。只要不是终于原著，非得安排RL离开怀孕的NT，非得让他们倒下的文，我都爱，最爱AU。NT的年上配对，作者只要能自圆其说，让感情有可信度，都是我真爱：）
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